Dimitie Kendall

An interesting thought popped into my head this morning so I thought I’d better explore it a bit more. The thought was, ‘if you want to change something, the first step is to question it.’

If you are like me you question everything!! It drives my husband crazy, especially if we are watching a movie for the first time ;-). I always ask him, “why is that character doing that? where are they going? what do you think will happen next?” “I don’t know?!!” is often the response from my husband.

I am probably not really asking him, I am really asking myself. I’m just verbal about it. You should see the amount of questions that go on in my brain!! I guess my verbalizing the questions out loud is the spillover from all the questions that build up in there!

Then it dawned on me this morning why I do it. The penny’s dropped and I realize that before I can change anything, I have to first question why it is happening or why I am thinking it. If I don’t, then there is no awareness that there is even a problem.

I really believe that once you start to question something, you place your focus on that issue and from there comes the awareness and then the choice to change.

How much would you say you question things happening in your life? Are there things in your life that you think you can’t change? Do you say to yourself, “Well that’s the way it is and I can’t change that!” Whenever you hear yourself saying that, I challenge you to question why your think that.

From my own personal experiences I know that our thoughts create our reality. So what reality are you creating? One that is happy, joyous and fun-filled or sad, unhappy and miserable? If we are joyous and happy, well then we don’t really need to question it. It’s how we are meant to be.

It’s only when we are sad and unhappy, that we need to start questioning why. So when something negative is happening in your life, are you questioning WHY it is happening to you? Most of us aren’t. We just tend to blame the other person for our unhappiness, instead of looking within and asking, “What have I done to attract this into my life?”” What is the lesson I need to learn here?”

Here’s an example of a negative thinking statement: “People are mean to me”. If you realize that you are thinking this way, chances are that’s what you will experience.

So how do you change that thought? Well you could affirm that “People are kind to me” and see if that changes it. Sometimes it can be as simple as that. However if you find you are doing that, and it’s still not changing, then you need to go deeper into your thinking and question the statement even further.

It goes something like this.

Statement: People are mean to me!

Question: Why are people mean to me?

Statement: Because I am mean to them!

Question:  Why am I mean to them?

Statement: Because my sister was mean to me growing up.

Question:  Why was my sister mean to me growing up?

Statement: I let her be mean to me.

Question:  Why did I let her be mean to me?

Statement: I didn’t know any other way.

Question:  Why didn’t I know any other way?

Statement: That ‘s the way it was in our family.

Question:  Why was it like that in my family?

Statement: Because my family was poor and had to struggle. So there was always a lot of stress in our household.

Question:  Why were they poor and had to struggle?

Statement: Because my family thought that was the way it was and that you couldn’t change anything.

When we question like this example we get down to the bottom of our thinking. From here we gain an insight into why we think those thoughts. I also think that once we understand our thinking it also gives us an understanding of our interactions with other people which therefore leads to more compassion for ourself and others.

So What are You Thinking Right Now? I challenge to you to take a look. You’ll be amazed at what you discover. Either write it down in a journal or talk to someone who will listen to you without judgement.

Love Dimitie xx