How To Stay Calm When Life Is Crazy!

 

How to stay calm when life seems crazy? Is that possible? The whole idea seems counterintuitive?!

When you are faced with a stressful situation, the last thing you feel like doing is stopping and being still, right? But that is exactly what you need to do!

I’ve been working on this for years and I’ve found that when I react or get caught up in the drama of a situation, it only escalates. So I have developed some techniques, to help you remain calm in all circumstances. 

There are so many stressful events happening in the world and probably in your life. The key to handling these stressors, is to remain calm. Sounds easy to do, but it’s not always the case. Why? Because everything we do can trigger a response in us, good and bad.

But how do we remain calm and peaceful in all situations? Here are three easy steps to get you started!

1. Take a Break!

An Argument

Have you ever been in an argument with someone and it escalates? The more you try to defend your point of view, the bigger the argument grows?  It happens all the time in our household (especially with teenagers!). Each person thinks their way is the right way. So we stand our ground trying to make the other person see we are right!! However using this kind of approach never works. 

So what do you do? Take a Break! Stop the argument by saying ‘you need to take a break to calm down’. Then, go and do something to calm down! Some of the ways I like to calm down are to go to my room and read, or watch a funny movie, or I might go outside for a walk. Then, when I feel calmer, I go back to the person I was arguing with and try to resolve the conflict in a peaceful manner. (it doesn’t always work, but it’s better than trying to kill each other!)

In my view most conflict comes from a misunderstanding or miscommunication with each other. But when you are angry with each other, its really hard to see the other person’s point of view. So if you take the anger out of the situation and remain calm, then you are more likely to resolve the situation. Sometimes you can’t reach an agreement, and if that is the case then it’s good to get help from someone who is impartial.

Solving a Problem

Einstein once said ‘We can’t solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them’. That is so true! If we keep focusing on the problem, we cannot come up with the solution. We have to change our thinking. So constantly worrying about the problem does not help us. We have to change our focus to a more positive way in order to solve the problem. 

One of the ways to do that is to Take A Break from our negative thinking! So that means going and doing things that take our mind of worrying. Things like listening to music, watching comedy, laughing with others, dancing, singing, walking in nature, exercising, being near the water, watching a sunrise or sunset. Or one that I really love to do and works so well, is Meditate!!

2. Meditate/Breathe

Meditation is a wonderful way to help you to calm down. Did you know that taking 3 conscious breaths in and out, is the start of Meditation? You don’t have to sit in Lotus position to start learning how to meditate. Just start by consciously breathing in and out 3 times. Simple.

But what do I mean by conscious breaths? It means when you breathe in, you’re totally focused on the breath going in and out of your body. Your awareness is drawn to your chest and abdomen rising and falling as you breathe. Sometimes placing one hand on your chest and one on your stomach while you breathe, can help you to focus better.

Do you know what the best thing is about learning to focus on your breath? It takes you out of your busy thinking mind!! Your brain can’t focus on thinking and breathing at the same time. It’s one or the other. Try it and see.

This is a simple technique that you can practise at anytime of the day.  However if you are like me and have trouble remembering, use something to remind you. For example, a reminder on your phone works well or just before you sit down to eat or some other daily task, like brushing/combing you hair, or while your waiting in traffic. These are called anchors and they help you anchor the task so you remember to do it. When you repeat a task over and over again, it becomes a habit.

3. Journalling

The third way to calm down is to journal. Writing down your thoughts and feelings really helps you see what you’re thinking. It’s also a way to get all those negative thoughts out of your head!

With some 60,000 thoughts a day it’s hard to keep track of what you are really thinking! Your thinking can either help you with a problem or it can escalate it with unnecessary fears and worries. So writing is a way to see what you are really thinking about.

One of the ways I like to journal is to write down the question I am wanting to know the answer to. Then I will sit quietly and wait for the answer. There is always an answer and I will write that down too.

It’s like having a conversation with yourself or another person. In my case it’s usually my Intuition (which is directly related to Source, God, Spirit, Universal Truth, Higher Power, whatever you like to call it). I know it sounds crazy, but the depth of the answer is usually more profound than anything my thinking brain could ever come up with. It’s always full of love and encouragement too.  

A tip, when you try this way of writing, if the messages seem negative, then it’s most likely your Ego talking and not your Intuition. Your Ego is always trying to give you the fearful scenario and your Intuition, the loving one.

So go get that journal and start writing!

 

So that’s 3 Steps you can take to remain calm in your busy life. I hope they help.

One thing to remember about all of this is to be Kind to yourself in the process! There are going to be days when you are triggered and don’t want to be calm and that’s OK! We are human after all and we have a huge range of emotions to express. However, the more we practice being the calm, the more it will be come a habit and our way of life. So why not start today!

If you liked this article, please feel free to share it with others. The more calm people in the world, the more peace there will be. It all starts within.

Love Dimitie xx

 

If you liked this article, here is another one related to this post that you might like to read. It’s about Learning to Listen to Your Intuition. Because listening to your Intuition is one of the key ways to learning how to remain calm. 

http://dimitiekendall.com/2013/09/trusting-your-intuition

 

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